5 Ways to Handle a Difficult Seller

Given the ups and downs of a real estate search and the love affair many buyers have with potential homes, I often feel that my job as your Realtor ® is one part agent, one part therapist, and one part matchmaker. You have gone to multiple open houses over the course of weeks or months in hopes of falling in love. You have certain things you know you need (a certain school district, number of bedrooms and baths) and certain things you want (a fireplace, a 3 car garage.)

Because you have spent the last few months looking at properties obsseively online, going to Open Houses and having your Realtor ® take you on private showings, you are turning into an expert on home value in the area. When you do finally find that exact right house, you know it is the one and you also know what a fair offer would be. The problem is the seller may not be as informed as you are on what a “fair offer” really is.

The seller has every right to reject a buyer for any reason whatsoever. They may stand firm on their price and wait it out for a stronger buyer or for that higher price. It could be they don’t like the buyer’s contingencies, such as the need to sell your home before buying, or they aren’t confident your financing will come through.

Here are five tips for dealing with a seller who is “just not that into you.”

1. Make A Final, Best Offer

After submitting an offer and even going through a series of counter offers, you realize you’re dealing with an uncooperative seller. You’re wasting time by holding back and playing his game. If you really want the home, it’s time to go to your max. By putting your best offer forward, you’ll have done all you can.

2. Move On

This is easier said than done, of course. But if the seller isn’t interested in working with you, move on. Hanging around wishing the seller will come to their senses and accept your offer is a waste of time and emotional energy. By pining away in your love affair with that house, you risk missing out on other great properties that are available and whose owners may be more “into” you. More often than not, in my experience, I have seen the Seller suddenly become more interested in the Buyer once they have walked away. You should only walk away if you really mean it, but don’t be surprised if that really isn’t the end.

3. Learn from the experience.

The sheer desire to own a home and the assumption that an available home should be yours doesn’t always translate into home ownership. If things don’t work out for you, analyze what went wrong. What mistakes could you have avoided? Did you spend too much time negotiating with that seller? Did you get too emotionally involved? If you can walk away with some lessons learned, your next try at home ownership should be easier and more likely to succeed. This is where having a Realtor ® can really help. I can help you think about the purchase analytically and use my experience to help you close the next deal.

4. Don’t try to figure out the seller.

You’ve got no idea what’s going on in a seller’s head. For all you know, the seller is emotionally attached to the home and not really ready to sell. Or maybe the sellers are going through a divorce, and one of them is hesitant to sell. It’s certainly tempting to play armchair analyst when a seller isn’t selling to you for mysterious reasons. It’s also, in most cases, a waste of time and energy. Accept the fact that the seller just isn’t that into you for whatever reason and move on.

5. Do try to figure yourself out.

Is there a pattern developing? Are you only going after the ones you can’t have? If so, are you sure you’re ready to commit? Buying a home is a huge decision and financial commitment.  If you find that you keep going after sellers that aren’t co-operating, the issue may be you, not them.